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Author: Ross
After the twelfth regeneration, there is no plan that will postpone death (The Day of the Doctor Speculations Part 2)
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Doctor Who: Polyamory Cutaway
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I’m Not the Man I Was. Thank Goodness. (The Day of the Doctor Speculations, Part 1)
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Continue reading I’m Not the Man I Was. Thank Goodness. (The Day of the Doctor Speculations, Part 1)
To the spammer who commented that I write very knowledgably on this subject…
It’s very kind of you to say so, but while I did flesh out the grammar and all, that story was written by a not-quite-2-year-old. It kinda gives the game away when your markov text generators fail to notice that.
The Big Choo-Choo Train
(Hey, check it out. I has a blog. And now it’s an exciting new WordPress-powered blog. I’ve always been happy with MovableType — this move shouldn’t be taken to disparage them. But I’ve been having some CGI issues with my web host recently, and apparently they explicitly support wordpress as part of my hosting package now, so I’m hoping things will be a bit more stable this way.)
The Big Choo-Choo Train
By Dylan
With Articles, Prepositions and the occasional Verb by Daddy
Once upon a time, Mommy and Daddy locked the door and went outside with Dylan. Daddy rang the doorbell – DING-DONG. Then Mommy rang the doorbell – DING-DONG. Grandma was outside in the car. Pop-Pop was also in the car. And so was cousin Maddie. Maddie wanted to play with Dylan’s toys, but Dylan said “No, no!” because he was not in the mood to share that day.
So Dylan and Maddie and Pop-Pop got on a big Choo-Choo Train. On the train, they met a bunny. A big bunny. A big talking bunny. The bunny was hopping. Dylan pushed a button on his laptop, and a doggie joined them and sang the A-B-Cs. Pop-pop read a book to Dylan while Maddie played with the big talking bunny.
While the bunny was hopping and the dog was singing the A-B-Cs and Pop-Pop was reading a book, suddenly, the Choo-Choo Train fell down! So Dylan got off the train. And Pop-Pop got off the train. And Maddie and the Doggie and the Big Talking Bunny got off the train. The Choo-Choo Train had a big boo-boo! Dylan picked the train up but they did not get back on the train because of the boo-boo. Instead, they put ice on the train’s boo-boo. Then Pop-Pop and Grandma and Maddie went home. Dylan played with the big talking bunny, but then the bunny fell down and got a boo-boo, because it hit its head on one of the posts of Dylan’s crib. So Dylan hopped all the way home.
It’s what food eats… Ross Cooks! Chickpea Meatloaf
It’s Lent, which means that for Catholics, it’s a time of sober reflection and not eating meat on Fridays, and for everyone else, it’s the 40 days between the day when women will show you their breasts in exchange for cheap beads and the day when an egg-laying rabbit gives you candy.
Under orders from my wife to come up with something meatless for Friday, I consulted the internet, and consulted what looked good at the grocery store, and I consulted the fact that I’m a big fan of garbanzo beans, and I came up with a meatless meatloaf that was a lot of fun.
As it turns out, chickpeas can neutralize a lot of spiciness, so even though this looks on paper like it ought to be pretty spicy, it’s actually flavorful but not especially piquant.
For a little extra flair, I put these together as individually molded “roasts” by cooking them in small pyrex bowls. This recipe filled three and three quarters one-cup bowls and one two-cup. I figured cooking them in a water bath would minimize cracking and make them easier to get out without breaking, but I’ve no idea. Some sautéed zucchini rounded out the meal.
- 400-500g chickpeas (About 2 cans, or half of a 1 lb bag of dried chickpeas rehydrated
- ¼ lb seasoned breadcrumbs (I pulsed some croutons in the food processor, having a big bag of croutons left over from Wednesday’s French Oignon Soupe Gratinée)
- ~3 Tbsp Spaghetti Sauce or crushed tomato
- 3 garlic cloves, crushed
- 1 large onion, diced fine or coarsely food-processed
- About 2 Tbsp fresh cilantro, chopped
- 1 green pepper, diced
- 2 oz diced green chiles (half a can)
- 1 Tbsp Chilli Powder
- 1 Tbsp Cumin
- 1 Tbsp Dried Oregano
- 2 eggs
- ~1-2 Tbsp grated swiss cheese (Again, because I had leftovers from Wednesday)
Preheat oven to 350°F. Sautee the onion, garlic, pepper, chiles and cilantro in some butter and/or olive oil over medium heat. Add the dry spices and cook until the onions turn translucent. Pulverize the chickpeas in a food processor, aiming for a sort of lumpy oatmeal sort of thing. If you use dried chickpeas as I did, it might help to add a little light vegetable oil to get something pasty. Canned might not need it.
Mix together the chickpeas, breadcrumbs and tomato sauce in a bowl and fold in the vegetables. Any experience you have with making a meatloaf will come in handy here: just knead/stir/mash it until it comes together like a meatloaf. Fold in the eggs — you might not need both eggs if it seems like it’s holding together on its own.
Spray some oven-safe bowls with baking spray. If you’re using cheese, sprinkle down a layer of cheese on the bottom of each bowl, then press the bowl just shy of full with the chickpea mixture.
Place the individual bowls in a water bath. If you’ve never done this before, it works like this: put the bowls in a largeish pan, like a lasagne pan, and put the pan in the oven. Then pour water into the pan around the bowls enough to fill it up to about the middle of the bowls. This is the technique that minimizes you splashing water all over the place and soaking your little chickpea roasts. Now, if anyone has a good technique for getting them out of the water bath at the end, let me know. I pretty much just ended up taking one for the team and grabbing something hot.
Cook at 350° for about 45 minutes or until firm. Remove the bowls from the water bath and run a thin knife around the edge of each bowl. Invert over a plate and give it a few gentle taps until the loaves fall out.
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Upgrades
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Item Get!
Scene from the Maryland Renaissance Festival.
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Some Thoughts on The Election
Well, the race is over, and now that the blinding terror that the possibility of a Romney-Ryan administration induced in me has passed, I thought I’d wrap up with a few thoughts on the whole thing.
1. As an upper-middle-class white heterosexual man, this election was, for me, an opportunity to choose sides based on whether I like liberal or conservative social and economic polcies better*(That said, even though I do prefer liberal social and economic policies, the reason I side with the liberals is because, regardless of whether or not their policies will be better for me personally, I feel a certain empathy for some of the groups I mention below and wouldn’t feel right kicking them to the curb.).
This just isn’t true for a lot of people, in both directions. If you’re a woman, then it doesn’t really matter if you think that conservative economic policies are good for the economy, because a vote for Romney is also a vote against fair pay for women and a vote against your right to make your own reproductive health decisions. If you’re a minority, it doesn’t matter if you think that a strong conservative stance on defence is good for the country, because a vote for Romney is also a vote for people who have been consistent in their use of race-baiting and racist dog whistles. If you’re gay, it doesn’t matter if you consider yourself in the line of Eisenhower and Reagan; a vote for Romney is a vote for you to never have the rights afforded you that are granted to the rest of humanity.
Contrariwise, if you’re a racist, it hardly matters if you think that the economic crisis was the result of underregulation; you’re voting for Romney anyway. And if you’re convinced that the life of a fetus trumps the rights of an adult woman, you have to hold your nose even if you think Mitt Romney is a psychopath. And if you’re a devout Catholic who feels the need to vote in a way consistent withthe teachings of the Church, well, it doesn’t really matter if you think Mitt Romney’s saber-rattling will bring about world war 3; the other guy wants to let two dudes get married.
2. President Obama won the election with only 39% of the vote among white men. Now, there are lots of reasons for that. White men, see 1, includes the group who got to choose their position based purely on whether they sided with liberal or conservative politics. And one thing that seems clear from trends is that the country is roughly evenly split between those positions, with perhaps a mild lean toward the conservative side. So the difference between the 50% we’d expect to find all things being equal and the 39% actual, and you get 11%. That’s the percentage of people who would have voted democrat, but were turned off by something. I’m not going to say what.
But it’s pretty much some combination of racism, sexism, homophobia, and the fear of losing their hegemon.
3. Also, President Obama won the election despite only having carried 39% of white men. For the first time in the history of the US, the decision as to who will lead this country for the next four years was made not by white men, but in spite of them. Hegemony’s over, guys. Relax. It’ll be great.
4. That Mitt Romney the Candidate was defeated is less important to me than that The Mitt Romney Campaign Strategy was defeated.
All politicians exaggerate, misrepresent, overpromise, mislead. This is a fact of life and part of the American political discourse ever since George Washington told the electorate that he could not tell a lie, and demonstrated this trait by making up a bullshit story about a cherry tree out of whole cloth.
But Mitt Romney’s political campaign displayed something I haven’t seen before. Mitt Romney has been accused of holding contempt for the truth. But that’s not it; the Mitt Romney campaign has displayed not contempt for the truth but rather an utter disinterest in the truth. Mitt Romney did not merely twist the truth or present misleading facts; he told bald-faced lies about things which were matters of public record, and when called on it, he showed no shame but rather was sort of insulted you’d dare accuse him of lying just because he knowingly told an untruth. This was a man who would literally say anything if he thought it would get him elected, not caring if it were true, false, or the exact opposite of the thing he’d said in his previous sentence.
And the electorate decided that wasn’t going to fly. Which is good, because if that strategy had proven a winning strategy, it would be impossible for anyone to ever win an election by caring about the truth. If it really is just as simple as “You can tell any lie you want,” there’s no winning strategy for telling the truth.
5. Lest anyone think I’m uncritical: In a sane world, Barack Obama would be the Republican candidate. Obama is not a socialist, he’s not even a liberal. President Obama is a reasonable, pragmatic, Eisenhower Republican. A proper liberal president would have stopped drone attacks, closed gitmo, given us single payer, and actually done something about the fact that our gun control laws were written by the gun manufacturer’s lobby. Such a candidate would probably lose to Barack Obama, but frankly, I’d rather have a chance to vote for a proper liberal who loses to a proper conservative, over voting for a faux-liberal who beats one of the sociopaths who took over the former party of responsibility. We used to have one party that dreamt big and one party that kept both hands on the wheel. Now we’ve got one party that keeps one hand on the wheel, and another that is intent on setting the car on fire.
6. By the way, an openly gay woman got elected to the United States Senate. Awesome.
7. Also, the people of three states voted in favor of same-sex marriage. So y’know what, fuck you, NOM.
8. Puerto Rico voted in favor of becoming the 51st state. Prompting me to discover that statehood was on the ballot in Puerto Rico.
Y’know, that seems like the sort of thing that the news might want to cover.
9. Good grief. Donald Trump has lost the rest of his mind.
10. So, the sun didn’t come up today. Crap. Chuck Norris was right.