In my business, we never make friends."
"Ah... Professional detachment?"
"No, we just don't have the knack.
-- Douglas Adams, The Hitch-hiker's Guide to the Galaxy, Episode 9

Tales from /lost+found 189: We’re not gonna pay

For time reasons, I’m forgoing my usual formatting for this script excerpt from “Twelfth Night”:


THE DOCTOR
You don’t have to do this.

VASTRA
They are savages.

THE DOCTOR
And you’re not. Senseless massacre won’t bring your sisters back. It won’t avenge them. And it won’t honor them. I know of your people. Homo Reptilia is a noble race. Be noble. Be merciful.

VASTRA
Do not speak to me of mercy, mammal. Not now.

THE DOCTOR
There’s only now. There’s only this. Forget regret, or life is yours to miss. No. Wait. Is that Rent? That’s rent.
(To SAMMY)
That felt pretentious. Is that what I am now? Pretentious?
(To VASTRA)
You think he’s an animal. He thinks you’re an animal. Prove him wrong.

VASTRA lowers her sword.

POLICE and THOMAS THOMAS enter.

SUTCLIFFE
Thank God. Constables, kindly remove this
(at VASTRA, sneering)
creature.
(Indicates THE DOCTOR, SAMMY and JENNY)
And this filth as well.

THOMAS THOMAS
(indicating SUTCLIFFE)
That’s ‘im, guv’nor.

CONSTABLE
Lord Sutcliffe, you are under arrest on suspicion of treason.

SUTCLIFFE
What?

THE DOCTOR
You probably shouldn’t leave documentation of your evil plans out where any prisoner could pass it out the window to a street urchin with instructions to deliver it to Scottland Yard.

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